Romney Concession Speech Leaks, Plagiarism Suspected…Again

WASHINGTON, DC—A thorough investigation of Romney campaign staffers is underway following the unauthorized release of what has been confirmed as Governor Mitt Romney’s concession speech for the 2012 Presidential Election. That the speech was confirmed sent to Romney headquarters and approved on October 15 may have been the greatest cause for concern surrounding the incident, had it not been so reminiscent of a statement made by Miami Heat forward Lebron James following his loss in the 2011 NBA Finals.

The official “They’ll never know that I didn’t write this book, either” face.

As for the 47% that wanted me to fail, at the end of the day, they have to wake up tomorrow and have the same lives that they had before they woke up today. They’ll have the same personal problems they had today. I, on the other hand, will continue to live the life of a successful businessman and continue enjoy the life I’ve made for my family. The poor can get a few days or a few months of enjoyment out of this, but they have to get back to the real world at some point. And their real world is hardly as sweet as mine…”

Romney’s speech is the most bizarre case of plagiarism since Romney misappropriated “Clear Eyes, Full Hearts, Can’t Lose”—a phrase created by Peter Berg for the television drama Friday Night Lights—as his campaign slogan. Although James’s speechwriter has not been located, Associated Press reports that he sent them a short text message in response: “Thought no one would notice the similarities since Mitt’s a white dude; my bad.”

With voting still underway, no one can be sure of the outcome of today’s election. But it is highly likely that America will be glued to their televisions tonight to see what speech Romney gives should he not emerge the President-Elect of the United States of America.

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